I can let go of control of the schedule! This summer I truly embraced the kid led summer for my four boys.

We woke up late, played outside all day, swam when it was warm, made art out of boxes, caught frogs and salamanders, baked a ton and read a ridiculous amount of books. My older kids 9 & 11 each got through four or five series.

By not over scheduling them or their weeks, I was able to see and support their interests. To truly spend time with them and take a real summer break. Was so happy to not have to wake up to rush to make lunch and to whatever camp was scheduled that week.

I also noticed a difference in my kids. They were happier to have the freedom over their schedule.

All in all this is something we will continue into the fall. Letting them decide how they want to spend their time.

I learned that parenting my nine-month old could help me lean into effort-FULL activities. Pre-parenthood, I might have spent my downtime watching a tv show or reading a book. But with my son, I found myself spending more of the summer on walks, exploring where we will live, and visiting with friends.

I learned that in ten years of parenting, I’ve gotten a lot more capable of staying calm with a crying baby (although I absolutely still hit my limit sometimes). Our third child is almost 7 months old and I have been surprised to discover that I don’t feel guilty every time he is unhappy the way I did with my first two babies. I think after getting through the toddler and preschooler years, I have better boundaries and finally believe in my bones that it is okay that sometimes things happen that my kids don’t like—whether that is a diaper change or getting their face wiped, or having to set the table or clean their room.

I don’t do morning workouts. I have been trying to force myself to workout in the morning because science says that’s the optimal time for productivity. But I end up not working out at all. And evenings didn’t work well until…my daughter started kindergarten a couple of weeks ago, which meant no more daycare 2-hr naps and thus a normal bedtime!! So now I can workout after putting her to bed at 8, and I absolutely love working out at that time. I have energy and my muscles are awake enough that I don’t feel like I’m going to hurt myself. Sometimes second best for others is the first best for me. Done is better than perfect.

I learned that I am really good at being a mom. My husband was away for 3 months at army basic training and I was solo parenting our 3 yo and 1 yo all summer. I gained a lot of confidence in my parenting and leadership skills as well as setting boundaries and prioritizing myself. Quitting Instagram (I was already off FB), growing in my Buddhist faith by listening to audiobooks, and doing more strength training instead of running due to an injury all benefitted me and therefore my family, too. I also learned that I really love my husband. We missed each other so much beyond just being co-parents.