Erin Vinesett

The world needs more humans like Alison who can stand in the spotlight and hold space for the struggle that is post partum. Women are expected to handle things better, and be tougher. There’s a guilt that comes with asking for help or needing medication. I am actually going through this currently as I am 18 weeks pregnant with my second. I had very bad PPD with my first (CS, 2020 pandemic baby) and see no reason not to proactively start Zoloft before delivering this baby. But, my dr. told me how I “might not need it”, that my “experience is so valuable”. But isn’t this just telling me that I should be able to tough it out this time since I know what to expect? Medication is safe during pregnancy, and if it can possibly help with any PPD that crops up, then why not? Why do I need to be “tough”?

I needed to know (truly know) that the newborn phase wouldn’t last forever. I also needed to realize (probably sooner) that being completely miserable and having very dark thoughts doesn’t have to be the norm. It’s a sure sign of PPD (which I had) and thankfully was screened for. The day I was flagged for PPD at the pediatrician, my OB saw me the same day. I really appreciated that they took it so seriously, but I was about 2 months post partum and just thought I needed to struggle through the initial phase. NO – get medication. It is OK if you need antidepressants to get through the first year with a new baby. It is insanely hard, and going back to work after 12 weeks (or shorter for some moms!) is very difficult. It’s not possible to “have it all” or juggle it all yourself. Ask for help and also let some things fall through the cracks – it will be OK. I am currently 13 weeks pregnant with baby 2 (3rd pregnancy) and I hope I can remember all of these tidbits that I learned from my daughter when I’m in the thick of postpartum fog.