Casha

In defense of the OP, just a quick comment to say that her post says she already did this and the 4yo is out of diapers but refusing to use the toilet!

Totally agree it’s so exhausting! I have no answers, and I don’t have endless energy for parent-led activities. I also think it’s ok and important for children to deal with boredom and self-direction since so much of daycare is structured!
One thing that helps is following their energy patterns. In the morning they have lots of energy and patience so we’ll do self-directed stuff or get outside. Mid day they take a screen time break with khan academy to recharge (two nap refusers and I need the break!). In the afternoon we tend to stay in since they’re tired and then we reverse the bedtime routine to do bath before dinner so I’m not fighting through bath with exhausted toddlers (we call it a backwards day). We also do tv in the evenings on weekends or holidays since we’re all exhausted by the end of the day. Sorry not sorry!