Karina

We had a parallel experience when my baby was born: we wanted everyone to mask, and on Thanksgiving, no less, my mother showed up not wearing one and, for lack of a better phrase, threw a fit that she was expected to wear a mask (around a 10-day old baby while covid was still lingering).

This scenario was more confrontational than yours but involved similar factors: lack of boundaries and lack of emotional maturity from a grandparent. We ended up in a deep confrontation that had been stewing for years (due to contributing other factors).

Confrontation is uncomfortable, can be scary, etc. But today, months later, after a lot of difficult but also productive and even healthy conversations (and therapy), we are better. My mother is a huge and critical participant in caring for our child – with whom she has a beautiful, trusting relationship.

My advice: dive into the stickiness with integrity and work hard through the hard stuff with the hope that you all might end up better for it. You might be grateful.