KLHK

I was very much unsure about whether I wanted a child, but my husband wanted one and I decided that being a parent with him was part of our journey together. I was well into 38 when our son was born; he’s now 29 months old and I absolutely adore him. Like so many commenters here, I have experienced that contradictory happiness and stress alongside each other at every step. There are far more doctor’s visits (for my son, then for me when I catch his bugs), more exhaustion, less opportunity to go out late with our childless friends, etc. But there’s also wonder and laughter and pure joy.
What I want to add, since I’ve not seen it mentioned as much here, is that Americans always talk about “having kids” in the plural. So when we think about the decision to have kids, it can feel even more overwhelming. It helped me to think about it as having “a kid.” My husband and I both are grateful for their siblings, and we both adore our son, but I also feel like one child is plenty for me/us. I’m now 41, so there is a lot more risk in having a second child, I’m not sure my body could handle another pregnancy without causing me chronic problems, and I feel like we can maintain a better balance and provide more for our son’s future by just having one child. My husband fully supports my desire to not have a second child (even though we both wonder about life without a sibling). But all of this is to say, if you decide to try to get pregnant (either choice is totally legitimate!), it can help to think about it as not a commitment to have even more children (though obviously be prepared for what you’d do if you became pregnant with multiples). I’m content with my amazing one child, and I don’t feel like I need to have more children to “do things properly.”