Outside Providence

Yesterday I spent 15 minutes wailing in the shower after my husband left to do the daycare drop off. There were no tears, but guttural sounds as I threw myself a bathtub pity party. Three months of irregular periods, pajama-drenched nightshirts, and don’t-talk-to-me-about-my-irritability irritability… could I really be entering peri-menopause 18 months postpartum at 40? I had spent 7 months doing IVF, had a challenging pregnancy, and have struggled postpartum while returning to my job in academia, and now this. While recognizing all of my privilege, I still need to say, being a woman is so hard. Thank you to the universe for dropping Gillian Goddard’s Hot Flashes into my inbox… I’ve forwarded it to my husband and my OBG appointment next week!