RCVWD

Of course the excessive tv and sugar, plus the late bedtime are problematic. The potential to miss school is even more problematic. But I think the biggest concern here is that someone who have presented to your child as a trusted adult has told your child “don’t tell mommy and daddy”. To me, that is a safety concern and an absolute deal breaker. Your child should have alarm bells go off in their body and mind if an adult ever says something like that to them. Your MIL is not only disrespectful to you and your partner and negatively impacting your child, but I genuinely view her as dangerous.