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Your comment made me think of my husband. He doesn’t have any diagnosis but I suspect he is some form of neurospicy and he also has a hard time with too much noise and we can’t really make a 2 year old be quiet. I bought him a pair of loops earplugs and encourage him to wear them when the noise is too much. Perhaps your husband could find something within his control to change so the noise isn’t overwhelming, rather than making your kids be quieter.