Caity

In my experience with my daughter’s grandparents, the more actual help they offer us (babysitting, bringing food, etc.), and the more they show a respect for our decisions and a willingness to do things our way, the more open I am to their suggestions because I’m already confident that they have our back and trust us as parents. Putting in the work to build that trust can go a long way.

FWIW I do think this depends on the relationship and the individual personalities involved. I have a great relationship with my MIL and we talk often, and it would feel weird to me if she skipped me to bring advice to my husband first.