Midwest Momx2

I agree with the other parents that have suggested a balanced approach. I would focus on the most important issue(s) and address those with my MIL. For us, that would mean the keeping secrets from parents, and maybe the going to school. I would explain why telling a child to keep secrets from their parents could be dangerous—-that it could be replicated and perhaps abided in a scenario that was much more harmful than too much TV or candy. I would also reinforce this one with my kiddos. And then I would probably let the other stuff go. Maybe if you have success with the priority issue(s) on this trip, you could revisit a new one the next time. I know it’s really hard to have your boundaries ignored—-I really struggle with this with our family as well. But I remember something Emily said on a podcast once, that parental anxiety and wellbeing actually have a much bigger impact on kids than many of the things we get anxious about. If taking the trip means you and your wife feel like you have the capacity to be better parents when you’re present, then that’s likely more beneficial than worrying over a few days of too much TV or sugary snacks.