RCM21

Excited that we’re taking a week in a national park onto our annual trip to visit in-laws (which I always dread). Now there’s something for me to look forward to and the trip feels like less of a chore!

That type of response is exactly why I’ve stopped being friends with SAHMs. At least in my experience, there is a constant need to assert that they are a better mom than me and have a harder job. All moms are valuable and have hard jobs: SAHMs, working moms, and part-time working moms (which is me). There is no need to compare or rank.

I come down firmly in the camp of it’s my partner’s responsibility and if he doesn’t do anything (which he doesn’t), that’s their own relationship and most likely, their less than stellar parenting (based on things he’s told me about them) at fault. But I also deeply dislike my in-laws so that probably colors my perspective.

Does the book discuss any postpartum medical conditions that were triggered by pregnancy? I developed an autoimmune disease 4 months postpartum, and according to a few doctors I’ve met with, pregnancy can actually trigger autoimmune diseases and I might not have developed one in absence of pregnancy. Do you have any data on the incidence of this, and the likelihood of another pregnancy worsening my now preexisting autoimmune disease?

The transition from 1 to 2 is what made me go down in hours at work. I had been at 35 hours/week with 1 kid, and it felt totally doable, but after the 2nd, I went down to 20 hrs/week. I’m so grateful my job was so flexible and am loving having the extra time with both kids, so it’s definitely not a complaint! Don’t be afraid to brainstorm creative solutions to make it easier!

Huge win: I’m the OP who submitted a question on Parenting with a Chronic Illness back in July. I was struggling with a severe chronic illness at the time and was unable to do much of anything with my kids, on FMLA from work, and felt incredibly worthless. Thanks to a ton of persistence asking my doctors for additional tests, I got a secondary, more treatable diagnosis and started some medication that has changed my life. I’m working again, able to take care of my kids, and even took a cross country ski vacation recently. Sometimes I feel like I’ve won the lottery at how much my life has turned around. I’ll always have to manage this chronic illness, but having treatments that make a difference is incredible. I’ve teared up just writing this haha.

Thanks for sharing! I’ve been seriously contemplating a third kid recently but am worried it will overwhelm much of my life. I know a third kid will bring a lot of joy but I’m worried at how much might be shaken up in the process.