AS80

You can hear the fear in this question – and it’s not unwarranted. Getting pregnant, being pregnant, giving birth, parenting…so much of the decision to have kids is just plain scary. Top it off with general life stressors of job, family, health, finances now compounded by this new, helpless little person and it can feel like A LOT. That being said – having a baby, becoming a parent, is the best thing that has ever happened to me. I had my first at 39 and my second at 43 (surprise!). When I got pregnant with my first I was excited but so anxious. And I won’t lie – it was an enormous shock to the system. An existential crisis, even. You might not “lose yourself” but you will be changed and it’s a jarring transition especially (I think) when you’re an older parent. But once you do make that transition and look back on yourself before your child, it feels – for me – like so so so much growth. You’re no longer living simply for yourself. Dare I even say your life is given new purpose? I think the only true preparation there can be is a willingness to let go, to become a new version of yourself. I don’t think any parent regrets having kids, we don’t dwell on that because the person who made that decision is no longer completely in our new reality. You just do it. And as hard as it can be, my god it’s the best. There’s nothing to compare it to. Just remember that expression, “Don’t look back, you’re not going that way”