Snoozen

I hope you have asked this in a forum for childless adults as well to get thoughts, because the answers you’ll get here are mostly going to be from people who are parents, and they are obviously biased.

If you are asking parents whether it’ll really always suck – no. The first year sucked, 2-3 was hard, it gets better. But your relationship with your partner and with yourself will change a lot after a child enters the picture. Do you have a village of support or the means to hire them?

We are one and done because we do not want to repeat the early years and don’t feel like there’s another child missing in our lives. So I would never judge someone for deciding not to have children to begin with. I don’t think having children is “right” for every person and while people may have FOMO, it’s important that they make the choice best suited for them.

Some alternative thoughts: could you borrow (babysit) your friends’ kids to “try” parenting? Do you think being foster parents could provide similar meaning in your lives (and help kids who need temporary loving homes, have one)?